Leadership Means Putting Others First

If you’re in a lead­er­ship position within an orga­ni­za­tion, it doesn’t stop at the office. The most effective leaders are leaders both in and out of work. As painful as it is to admit, I’m nowhere near the leader or person I hope to be. I’ve recently had three different inter­ac­tions with friends in which my actions were dis­ap­point­ing, and with less than desirable outcomes. What did they have in common? My “ME FIRST” attitude—I acted on “ME first,” because my thoughts were of “ME first.” I was focused on my agendas without listening to, under­stand­ing, or con­sid­er­ing the wants and needs of others. Yep, I was pretty dis­ap­pointed in myself. So after apol­o­giz­ing and wallowing in self-pity, I decided to do something about it. I need to improve on putting others first—do you?

Listen Better

My listening skills are chal­lenged at best. To put others first, I’m con­cen­trat­ing on what they have to say, not so much about what I want to say. Asking open-ended questions helps.

Be More Considerate

These words are so common, I think they’ve lost their meaning. Being con­sid­er­ate means con­sid­er­ing what others want and need, and how my actions may affect their desires.

Think Past the Moment

What may seem appro­pri­ate for the moment, may not be, when viewed through a wider lens. I ask myself, “how important is this now?” What are the con­se­quences of my actions?

Set Ego Aside

This is my Achilles heel. It’s the big one. I want things to go my way because… I’m special. I want to share infor­ma­tion and show how knowl­edge­able I am, even if it hurts others; I seldom hesitate to disparage others if I think it will get ME a laugh. I’m working on setting my ego aside; besides… self-deprecation is in-style, isn’t it?

When your actions are thought­less and hurtful, an apology never brings back the time lost in regret; by the time you realize what you’ve done, it can be too late. It would be unre­al­is­tic to think I’ll never put myself in this position again—I will. But I can work towards reducing it, can’t I? In the long run, putting others first is in my best interest, AND theirs. Leaders put others first. Be a leader 24/7.